


Goodbye, Miss Swan

by AfterGiAni



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Subtext
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-24
Updated: 2015-11-24
Packaged: 2018-05-03 05:58:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5279369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AfterGiAni/pseuds/AfterGiAni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Documents the palpable amount of subtext during the confrontation between the Regina and Emma at the very end of Dreamcatcher (Season 5, Episode 5).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye, Miss Swan

“Can you do what your apprentice said?” Hook paused before making his hopeful plea known. “Can you free Emma from the darkness?”

“Sure. But, with a caveat.” A knowing smirk overtook Merlin’s face as he addressed Emma directly, “Darkness like this takes ahold of a person. Finds its way deep inside where nobody else can see. So, if I am to free you from its grasp, I must know one thing.”

Emma held her breath. She felt transparent and vulnerable. She felt as though Merlin knew what she was hiding. He continued, “Emma, is your heart truly ready to be free? Because it is as much up to you as me.”

Then, no. The only answer was no. Her heart would never be free. It hadn’t been free since that moment nearly two years ago when Henry persuaded her to come to Storybrooke with him and she met his other mother. She decided to stay even though she didn’t entirely understand why. Prior to that, she had only known one mode of operation. Running. She never thought staying was an option for her. But, she knew this was where she belonged. Even if she didn’t entirely understand why.

With every click of the clocktower, her feelings grew, her awareness grew, and her resolve to keep those feelings buried grew.

So, let the darkness take its grasp. Because those feelings will never see the light of day. 

Now, six weeks from the moment she made her decision to stop fighting the darkness, she stood in the dark before the door of 108 Mifflin Street as it swung open.

“Emma,” Regina spat her name. Those two syllables were filled with all of the resentment and all of the bitterness two syllables could hold.

“Hello,” Emma replied cooly. She surprised even herself with how easily she was able to keep her composure in front of the object of nearly every thought and every desire she had kept hidden for these two years. 

“What the hell is going on? What are you doing?” 

“I’m here to see Henry,” she lied. Of course, she wished to reconcile with Henry. But, that wasn’t the only reason she was there. She needed to see for herself that there was no hope for her and Regina. If she was going to have the strength to go through with what she had to do, she needed to be sure.

“You know that’s not what I mean. You took our memories and now Gold. What are you trying to do?”

Emma stared blankly at Regina. Her mind raced with all of the things she had never been able to tell Regina. A flurry of emotion that had built up to something so large that there was simply no room for passage between her thoughts and her words. Her face let on to none of this.

“Emma, there is nothing you can’t come back from if you just tell us,” Regina pleaded.

Just tell you? thought Emma. If only you knew. Emma had convinced herself that there was no way Regina would ever return her feelings. She had thought for a brief time after Robin, that maybe there was a chance. That she might be Regina’s happy ending. But, with the way Regina had reacted to Robin’s return, she knew. Regina’s feelings had never been for her. So, when the darkness threatened to overtake Regina, Emma did the only things that made sense. If she couldn’t have Regina, she could at least save Regina and give her her happy ending.

“What I’m doing is my business. But, it’s for the best. Trust me.” Trust me. There would be know coming back from the truth.

“I was starting to. And, like Henry, I was seeing the good in you. But, I was wrong. I thought you could be different. I thought you could escape the darkness then you had to go and rip a thirteen girls heart out.”

“What?” How could Regina know about that? What else does she know?

Regina held up the dreamcatcher that revealed the truth of Emma’s actions back in Camelot. “Now you’re breaking and entering,” she accused. She knew her defense was weak, but it was all she could come up with as her composure started to diminish. He composure always diminished when it came to Regina. She needed to end this conversation. Soon.

“Oh no. You don’t get to be self righteous with me. Not after what you’ve done. Henry saw what you did. He’s devastated.”

“I was trying to make it up to him.”

“Make it up to him? By reuniting a girl and her horse? Lemme guess. You let the damn thing out in the first place. You forget. I have some experience with Dark Ones. Everything’s a manipulation.”

“Well, it would have been fine if you had just helped yourself and stayed out of it. Maybe you’re the one causing pain.” It was true. Regina was the cause of every pain within Emma. She was the reason for every move Emma had made. Of course, as Regina didn’t know any of this, Emma’s words seemed as though she was simply grasping at straws.

“Wow. Listen to you trying to justify everything. If I’m the one on the moral high ground, you’ve fallen quite a ways Miss Swan.”

There it was. Miss Swan. That title that always put Emma back in her place. Every time she thought they were getting closer, Regina would spit out those two words reminding Emma that there relationship was nothing more than a formality. Emma’s composure diminished even further, “Don’t Miss Swan me. We’ve been through too much. You know I never would have done that to Henry if I didn’t have good reason.”

“Good reason? You know that’s exactly what my mother said to justify what she did to Daniel.”

“What I did in Camelot, I did to protect Henry.”

“She thought she was protecting me, too.”

“I didn’t have a choice.” Can’t you see that? Emma longed to tell Regina the truth. She longed to shout it out. But, she was way past that point now.

“There’s always a choice, Emma. You’ve said that to me a thousand times.”

She longed to tell her that she would choose her. She would always choose her, but she knew Regina would never choose her back. So she grasped again, “We were running out of time. It was the only way to free Merlin.” And, she slipped.

“Merlin? You freed Merlin in Camelot? But, if that’s true. Why are you still the dark one?”

Regina would never know. Emma had embraced the darkness to ensure that Regina would never know. “This is a waste of time. I want to see my son.”

“Well, I don’t think he wants to see you. Goodbye, Miss Swan.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you read this, thanks! Sorry if there is already a fic on this. I was searching for one and couldn't find one so I went ahead and put down what I felt was going on during this scene. I may be encouraged to do more or continue down this road if anyone likes this start.


End file.
